Twenty and eighteen

Twenty eighteen.

Feed yourself–no, your self. Look deep on the inside of things. Are they worthwhile? Positive? Give your mind to things that are, and therefore pay attention to what you are giving your attention to. Don’t get trapped in a cycle of toxic negativity. Notice things. Stay aware. But not analytical. You also have to feel, blindly let your emotions do what they are meant to. Don’t suppress what is natural. Watch your self grow.


She freezes quietly

Slow Blues – The Jimi Hendrix Experience…….

I don’t think there is any love left for me here, time unwinds slowly and tenderly

in the gray blue winter, and I can only stare at it, so tortured, so calm,

The sun is dying, I can feel her, she freezes quietly…



War, what is it good for

War. It is not an invented concept, but rather something that has always plagued the human race, some ancient deep aggressive ritualistic-goat-sacrificing primitive part of us that we haven’t quite conquered yet. The Primitive Aggression floats to the surface and it reeks of fear and death. It disguises itself in modern times, as, perhaps, a shirt-and-tie rational business-venture-type deal, or maybe, as if not totally paradoxical, a noble, stoic fight toward peace (or perhaps toward whatever tomorrow’s nationalistic dream is)–anything to hide its ugly face, to hide the shame of how terribly easily we humans can be controlled by our goat-sacrifice-type impulses.

Well let me tell you, I’ve had enough. I’m sick of war being treated like a necessity, being described as natural, even, being talked about like a rationale, like a bridge to finally reach Peace.  Because it has been made clear, over the past few, say, hundreds of years, that war and peace are mutually exclusive, that, like the same ends of two refrigerator magnets, each repels the other.

And the thing about war is that there is no healthy portion of it. There is no healthy Diet War or War Zero that would make it okay. We have to stop it completely to ever even lay our fingertips on real peace. We have to find a new way to resolve our conflicts, and finally, finally move past this ancient and pathetic part of us. Like a tired and pale alcoholic at the end of his rope, we must stand once and for all and decisively admit the problem. We have to uninvent war because, really, we have no other choice.

rip journalism

The immortal yet the dying. The truth yet the grossly and improbably fabricated. It dies and is posthumously replaced by its own dust. An ancient and pale art is held at the throat and dismantled within an inch of its life. The archaic journalism industry as we know it is being disfigured beyond recognition. Journalism, the media, the source of public information, which has henceforth survived McCarthyism, muckraking allegations, et al., now shakes down to its very foundation from the voice of the internet: online inflation of information, empty words inside of the shell of real journalism like a gutted crab. Opinion and fact have been crossbred beyond separation. It has never been the public’s job to sort through real and false information, until now. It is modern day and the public takes one of three paths: they either eagerly ingest information exactly as it is presented to them because they agree with it, doubt or disregard every piece of news, or stop consuming news altogether.

This is why I am determined to rescue it.


Everything teems with a buzz, a drive. Everything is very, very alive and loves being so. The flowers are as orange as their sun, their mother, and grow ever fonder of her as the long warm day stretches on. The trees race among themselves to be the most vibrantly green of them all, and, looking at them, you can say to yourself: This is alive.

And the people are wrapped more and more tightly in this life as the days go by, and slowly the layers seep into their bones, and they glow in agreement and congruency with the life that surrounds them.

the versatile blogger award

Thank you so much to hailangeliccreation for nominating me for the Versatile Blogger Award. People like you keep me creating.

Rules of the Versatile Blogger Award:

  1. Thank the blogger who nominated you and share their link.
  2. Nominate at least 10 bloggers for the award and provide links to their blogs. Also, inform them about the nomination.
  3. Reveal 7 facts about yourself that your readers may not know.

I nominate the following:

1. OfOpinions

2. The Little Vegan Kitchen

3. ValsDarkRoom

4. allisonmarieconway

5. jacquelinemhadel

6. heideblog

7. Idiot Joy Showland

8. The Insatiable Traveler

9. ramaarya

10. Ben Trovato

All of the above creators have brought me a lot of inspiration and have led me to a good deal of reflection on my own blog.

Seven Facts:

1. I am madly in love with the sun.

2. I believe in the Last Thursday Theory–that the whole universe and all of its memories could have been created just last Thursday–mainly because no one can prove it wrong.

3. I believe lots and lots of coffee is the only path to thorough and eternal joy.

4. I think I am very old inside; I love extremely old things and antiques.

5. I have been vegan for almost two years (without malnourishing myself even once!)

6. The further The Eagles’ music gets into Country-Rock, with emphasis on the Country part, the less I enjoy it.

7. I have a small, black birthmark on the iris of my eye.

Feel free to leave comments or questions. Happy writing, and thanks again to my nominator.



See that! That exciting exclamation mark! It is very appropriate. I am exploring, and it is rightfully exclaimed.

My only blog post this far has been me whining about the trappings of my hometown. But I want to be more than that. I am exploring myself and my tiny little world. I am exploring my mind and trying to make it not so tiny. I want to dig and find everything that is wonderful and beautiful. This disposition has risen from 2 reasons, 2 recent realizations: the mandate of the present and the meaninglessness/fleetingness of life.

It was recently related to me that the past and future don’t exist. It sounds an odd and easily refutable claim. However, when truly examined, the present really is all we have. The past and future are just imagined—they live only in our minds. All we really know to be real is what we feel and see and think in this moment, right now. This inhale, this exhale. The sound of our heart faintly heard in the quiet. The present is our only reality, everything else a figment of our imagination.

If that’s not existentialist enough, I have also recently been subjected to the all-encompassing thought of death, of the brevity of life, and its ultimate meaninglessness. A stimulant of these thoughts was the recent death of a professor I had just last semester. She was only seventy-two. In the middle of a successful career, holding many respectable local positions, in good health, she simply died. This made me angry. That is not how it’s supposed to work; you’re born, you go to school, you have a career, you retire, and you only then do you die, warm in your bed, satisfied and happy and surrounded by your whole family. That is the paradigm. You’re not supposed to die at the peak of your career. But death does not care. It simply took her.

I will appreciate my present because I have to. I have to love where I am and who I am. That is all I have; that is all any of us have. So here’s to exploring the now.